Yesterday we had a full house. Oliver (the dog) is visiting with us since last Thursday until next Sunday because his owners are vacationing in Spain. Kinga (5 years, in red pants with Taylor) and Jordan (2 1/2 years, holding tight to Oliver) were here 10Am to 1Pm to play.We started with coloring in books and then painted some crafts. Kinga choose the butterfly, Jordan the dog (obviously she was more interested by Oliver than us the humans), and I painted a turtle to give it as a gift to a friend who collects them (actually she collects frogs...). Then we took a walk to the beach where they climbed the play house, and took a swing (till they got bored and we needed to move one). We had lunch then played some more :-)
I don't know who had more fun: we the humans or the two dogs, perhaps all of us!
I enjoyed the two little girls, I know I am good with kids, and always was better with kids than with adults. Adults are so serious, they have those big people talks, they are not as fun as little ones. With kids we can invent games, we can laugh, and change quick the topic of conversation and play (they get bored fast), we do things! Perhaps that is the most important in our relation "We do things!"
When teaching about gender issues to my students I mention that friendship relations are many times different for women and men. Usually women sitting face-to-face enjoy talking and sharing emotions, words, tears, touch and hugs. Men usually are shoulder-to-shoulder and doing something, might design a project, build, share opinions looking at something (be it a car, a lawn, or watching a game). I also mention that many times this categorization falls into the category of stereotype, since there are men who love just talking to their male or female friends, as there are women who base their friendships on the action part in their relationship to female or male friends.
Thinking about my relationships and asking myself why I feel more comfortable with kids I realize that it is not kids by exception I enjoy, but it is the "doing" part of it. Just sitting and talking, chatting, sharing the words is not pleasurable for me. I need to feel the person involved in a common goal. I need to look at the same target with my friends, to do together something, to build a common good, to have a common goal. And then I tell myself that it is not the gender stereotype, but it is personality style. For me it is more important to have a common goal that we can base our friendship, words alone become a ground for friendship only if shared for building a common goal. I need to create something with words, I need a target, I need to build with words, otherwise they become just plain talk which in my opinion is boring!
I will forever be an engineer :-)
Oh, this is another stereotype...